Tired

Endless argument with small things, hopeless life with the future I am try to make it brighter. I am so tired, so tired, so tired.

People said that women in the MP are emotional, I know I am. When I am not emotional, I have the strength, strength to ignore all those things, brave enough to deal with the issues, positive with the current life and future, even thought I know what it is looks like in real. But my strength will get weaker, need to fill up. Yes, Lord is my strength, he guide me and helps me. However, I am a human being. And I don't want cry to him every single time (even I am doing it now.)

Life is complicate, I know. But I don't know to express your feeling is that hard. I don't know how to tell, how to make the conversation, I tried, push, whine, angry, ignore, calm, kind and love... yes, the love, make my pain even heaver. With this word, I feel I can't breath..

I don't want to describe the details what make me upset, no significant things, just the little things in my life... every single time... any time , any circumstance.. make me very very unsafe. But, I just can't say it.  

The time will past, life is going on. What can I do with it.